Author

George Burns

29 quotations

About George Burns

George Burns was an American comedian, actor, writer, and singer, and one of the few entertainers whose career successfully spanned vaudeville, radio, film, and television. His arched eyebrow and cigar-smoke punctuation became familiar trademarks. He and his wife Gracie Allen appeared on radio, television and film as the comedy duo Burns and Allen.

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Topics: Age Funny Failure Future Happiness Money

I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.

Everything that goes up must come down. But there comes a time when not everything that's down can come up.

I'd rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I hate.

I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.

I can't afford to die I'd lose too much money.

Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.

I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.

Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman it depends on how much happiness you can handle.

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.

Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman - or a bad woman it depends on how much happiness you can handle.

Look to the future, because that is where you'll spend the rest of your life.

I look to the future because that's where I'm going to spend the rest of my life.

Retirement at sixty-five is ridiculous. When I was sixty-five I still had pimples.

I spent a year in that town, one Sunday.

If you live to be one hundred, you've got it made. Very few people die past that age.

When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.

Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.

I'd rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I hate.

I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.

I'm very pleased to be here. Let's face it, at my age I'm very pleased to be anywhere.

I'm at the age now where just putting my cigar in its holder is a thrill.

I smoke ten to fifteen cigars a day. At my age I have to hold on to something.

I would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.

At my age flowers scare me.